Community Blog

5 ways to influence your parents to get the help they need

By Home Helpers - Walnutport

Our aging parents often want to hold on to their independence, rightfully so, but you as their adult children may see that your parents need assistance. Here are some ways to suggest that it's time to get some help.

Perhaps no situation is as uncomfortable as an having to convince a parent it is time to seek help.

Feelings of guilt are the biggest thing most children face, because few of us want to admit that our parents have reached an age where they are in need of that extra assistance. We tend to feel as though the responsibility to provide that support ourselves. However, there comes a point when the pressures of caring for our parents, a career or a young family at home can mean it's time to call in some help.

Tactics to get your parents help

Your parents may resist having discussions about this topic. You can try these strategies to convince them that it's time to ask for help.

1. Pick the right time and place for the conversation. Select a non-emotional location as the first step to having a successful conversation about such a sensitive subject.

You might not want to have this discussion around the holidays or even in your parents' home. Perhaps instead head out for breakfast or lunch and plan to have the discussion in a neutral location away from distractions.

2. Ask questions to direct the discussion.  You should try to lead your parents to a solution by asking them questions and letting them come to the answer is a great approach. Using this method you can ask parents what they would do if they fell at home or if they could no longer perform household chores or daily tasks.

3. Know your options in advance. Do your homework before having the conversation so that you are ready to provide specific recommendations for your parents. Some times parents might equate asking for help with losing their independence, and hearing the specifics of what you have in mind can be reassuring. 

4. Point out the benefits. To help with the concerns about losing their independence you may want to have a conversation about some of the benefits of home care services. Some examples can be:
If they help with meals and groceries, it will free up time for you to do other things. It will also provide more quality time that you as the adult child can spend with your parent instead of working for them.

Home Care Bath, PAEncourage parents to see how getting assistance with basic tasks can allow them more opportunities to pursue hobbies and personal interests.

5. Call in a higher authority. Almost every family has an authority figure -- someone everyone takes seriously -- whether it's a relative, religious leader or even a favorite child. Although it can be difficult to admit, caregivers can sometimes be too close to the situation, and parents may need to hear from someone else that they should get help.

It's always best to keep your egos out it. 

Ultimately, adult children can beg and plead, but in the absence of severe dementia or personal safety concerns, the decision to seek help largely rests with the parent.

For more information or to find out what services are available for home care in your area please call Home Helpers Walnutport at 610-596-7055.